


Taste of brine, scent of ash

by TucuTucus



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Aquaphobia, Canon-Typical Violence, Dissociation, Drowning, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, No Dialogue, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-10
Updated: 2019-12-10
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:15:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21746626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TucuTucus/pseuds/TucuTucus
Summary: After getting attacked by pirates, Nott and Caleb have to deal with some memories they rather not have.
Relationships: Nott & Caleb Widogast
Comments: 2
Kudos: 86





	Taste of brine, scent of ash

There is a certain comfort in silence.

Of course, Nott can't enjoy that comfort, since her goblin ears are able to catch the faint snoring of the two deckhands in the same room as her, the muffled conversations on the deck of the ship, the waves and the water thrashing- crashing, at the side of the ship.

By the time she finished checking and unlocking the two chests they managed to salvage from the pirate ship, the water had almost dried off, so she scurried to the bedchambers, to drink and be alone for a while, though the alcohol was having little effect and the burn of the whiskey didn't mask the taste of brine and silt- salt, of the ocean water.

She decided to sleep it off. At least, she tried.

Her mind kept playing back the memories over and over. The moment that brute had grabbed her wrist and threw her off the side of the ship. The cold shock as she splashed down into the ocean. Her panicked thrashing to get out of the binds on her wrists and the hands pushing her down further and to catch up with the ships that were leaving her behind. And to Jester, diving in after her and opening a dimension door back to their ship.

Every memory piled on, driving her into the smallest ball she could manage, pulling her hood protectively over her head, almost like if she wanted to hide.

It's stuffy inside her hood, mostly after she tried using her arms in an attempt to drown out the ever presence of water. A drop of sweat tickled the corner of her lips, and she intended to lick it off, but as soon as her tongue brushes against the jagged edges of her teeth, she decides against it and to dry it off with the inside of her sleeve.

Nott had grown accustomed to the sharp ridges that her teeth now have. That did not mean she liked that feeling, it crossed a fuzzy line between strange and familiar that made her uncomfortable.

She much rather feel the trickle of warm sweat running down her brow and back, than the chilling reminder of water.

Water, water, why did they have to come back to the ocean? Yes, Jester needs them to be with her for this Travelercon thing, and Nott wasn't going to ignore that, but she would have rather it being anywhere but an island.

Nott reflectively tensed her muscles in panicked frustration, her claws digging into her scalp, her arms pressing the sides of her skull as if it would help her escape, but her thoughts dance and spiral like a fathom inside her head, making her mind a whirlpool that she can't get out of-

The door opened, snapping her out of the fog of memories. She didn't have to look to recognize the light, dragging gait of Caleb. He had been identifying what they'd gotten from the pirates, so how long has it been since she'd fled to the hold?

There was a ring, dagger, sword, and a cloak, so ten, twenty, forty minutes? It sure didn't feel that long.

A light nudge was enough for her to reflexively slide over to make room for him to sit and she winced as her body made it clear she'd been in that one position for too long.

She let out a sigh, the sound matched by one of Caleb as he settled in next to her, then a snap quickly followed, as a sleepy purr started close to her ears.

Caleb had been amazing in the fight. Strategical, sharp and precise with his spells, like when those pirates surrounded Beau and, knowing she would be safe, casted fireba- oh, she forgot, how his shoulders slumped ever so slightly, how the determination in his eyes vanished, replaced in succession with fear, sorrow, and cold numbness. It hurt her heart to remember how the shine of his eyes reflected a sail aflame and the lifeless, charred body of one of the pirates getting kicked off the side. It hurt even more to know what it meant to Caleb. It's good that Caduceus was able to snap him from his frozen stupor, pulling him away from the edge.

Nott caught the sound of nails scratching at dry skin above her head, and quickly noticed that she had been massaging her wrists as well, thumb tracing over the spots where she remembers the binds hurting more.

She reached into her hood, into her damp hair, both from sweat and ocean, and pulled out a flower that would keep her hands occupied, back lightly pressed against Caleb's thigh.

A hand brushed a flock of hair out of her eyes before sweeping along her arm in an affectionate caress, where it settled for a moment. Nott would place a hand on top of his.

Fjord must have been controlling the water below them to make the ship go faster. The bow of the ship made a dull thud every time it came down off the waves.

It reminded her of a heartbeat.

It was soothing.

Closing her eyes, she sighed again and snuggled closer to Caleb's side, neither of them inclined to talk.

There is a certain comfort in silence.


End file.
